Shanon’s Blog

No worries anyone….the bloody ear is okay. I did go to the doctor yesterday to get it checked out because it did hurt and everyone was saying that I might have busted my eardrum or something. I didn’t. Apparently my man hands took one of their ginormous fingers and stuck them as far into my ear canal as I possibly could and I scratched it. And apparently everything above the neck bleeds profusely when it’s cut or scratched or anything. Anyway, I am fine. I still have a left ear and I can still hear out of it.

Here’s my list of things I want to get done this year.

1. Drive the speed limit and be OK with it.
2. Figure out what it’s gonna take for me to get and stay happy
3. Eat as much cheese as I can because cheese is one thing that makes me smile
4. Get a tan in the summer in honor of my former career as a tanning model
5. Get to the expert level on Guitar Hero
6. Buy a Jeep by November
7. Learn how to make the artichoke casserole I had on New Year’s Day
8. Shave my legs at least 4 days a week
9. Do my hair every 6-8 weeks like I’m supposed to but never do
10. I do want to at least know what a truck stop shower looks like, but I’m not going to shower in one
11. Win at the best game ever, Flamin’ Finger

I feel so bad. I had Oprah, my dog, spade yesterday and she is so upset with me. She has to wear one of those lampshade thingy’s so that she can’t lick the incision spot. She doesn’t quite understand that it’s around her neck and so she keeps knocking into things and it’s so sad. She slept with me last night (as she usually does), but she usually insists that I pet her until she falls asleep. Well last night she just wanted my hand on her. She didn’t care if I pet her. She didn’t lick me non stop like she usually does. She looks at me with her sad little eyes and my heart melts. I know that it needed to be done, but why does it have to feel so bad?

I’m noticing myself in a lot of situations that leave me not knowing what to say lately. Yesterday my friend called me with news that left her crying all morning long and not knowing what to do. She had to get a lawyer and all kinds of stuff. Granted I would never know what legal advice to give her, but I should have had more than just “Oh my goodness…I’m so sorry.” That does her no good. In fact it’s kind of a waste because she’s using her cell phone minutes to call and hear me say “I’m sorry.” It’s kind of like everyday is a step backwards in my brain. Like yesterday I couldn’t find my dogs vets office for the longest time. I’ve been there no less than ten times before. All of my animals use Dr. Holt. But my brain just could not piece together how to get there again. Why is this? I’m at a loss. Again, I don’t know what to say.

I’ve had a little bit of a cough the past couple of days, so I stopped at Walgreens last night to get some cough syrup. I bought Buckleys cough syrup. Can I just say that this could be the best stuff ever? I was able to sleep last night and not wake myself up coughing. So, if you have a cough, this stuff is worth a try. It tastes pretty horrible. They even say that on the box. But it didn’t make me gag or anything, so it must not have been too bad. Try it. It works.

It was a good vacation, but I think I slept too much. So today was a real shocker going from 14 hours of sleep to 3 hours. But I’m used to this and while this week will be hard, it will be nice to back into the routine. I cannot believe how much I slept on vacation, even during the big trip to New Orleans.

Where do I start? Christmas was good. My mom and dad gave me a GPS system which I needed because I’m a geographically challenged moron. Anytime I go somewhere new, I have to leave early to give myself time to be lost. And even then I cannot guarantee that I will make it there on time.

I’ve come out of my annual holiday funk, I think. Maybe that’s the reason I slept for 14 hours a day. I HATE the holidays. On Christmas night I stayed up til 6AM freaking out over the same old stuff. I would’ve blogged about it, but who really cares. The holidays should be happy, so I just kept my little fit to myself and dealt with it the best way I knew how. Locking myself in my apartment on any occasion I didn’t have something else going on. I do it every year. It never does me any good, but whatever.

We went to New Orleans for a little visit with Super Steve and his wife, Tammy. It was a blast. The drive there wasn’t too bad. I made Keith let me drive the whole way because I have a hard time sitting still that long so I might as well just drive so that my arms and foot are moving. It worked. I managed to do the entire drive without going crazy. I am that driver Nazi who refuses to stop until it’s necessary. Especially when it comes to a trip with Keith. He smokes and I don’t like it. It takes up my time waiting for him to do it. The smell is horrible. So I purposely stopped as little as possible so he couldn’t smoke. I know that’s mean of me, but I don’t feel bad.

We went out on Friday night and Keith had more fun than anyone. In fact he had so much fun, he passed out on a pole. We went to this amazing little bar called the Gold Mine. It was so much fun. I love hip hop and rap and they played all the great ones. They also threw in some Neil Diamond and all kinds of good stuff. I danced until my clothes were soaked. I doubt that I danced well, but I danced. They don’t call me Dancin’ Fool for nothing.

New Years Eve was greatness. My friends Jen O and Michelle flew in to spend the night with us and we had so much fun. We were on Bourbon Street with thousands of other people when it was midnight. I wouldn’t have even known that it was time until they started playing that song that they always play at New Years. Then we headed back to the Gold Mine where it was an inferno. It was so packed, we didn’t last long. But it was fun for a few minutes.

New Years Day was fun, too. They had a bunch of people over and made beer can chicken and artichoke casserole (which was AMAZING) and other stuff. I think football was on and we did fireworks and just had fun.

We played football on Saturday and I am so cut and bruised and sore. Ugh. I’m the idiot who wore shorts to play and then I ended up having to get blood on my shirt because I bleed like it’s no big deal even when the cut is tiny. We played really well and it was fun, too.

Today I have a bloody ear which is really kind of gross. I had blood on my shirt when I woke up this morning, but I didn’t know where it was from. Then I noticed that my ear was hurting and then I saw blood on my earlobe. I’m thinking it’s not a big deal and I don’t need to go to the ER or anything, but it is gross and it does hurt. I guess I will just hope that it stops bleeding and go from there. Who wants to deal with a nasty ear like this? Not me. So I want it to stop already. I hope I didn’t get blood all over my pillow and pillowcase because I will have to toss them both. I don’t want to sleep on a bloody pillow at night. I will look first thing when I get home. Oprah goes to the vet to get spade tomorrow. I’m very random. I’m told I need to get on Aderol or something. Maybe I misspelled Aderol, but spell check came up with nothing, so I’m gonna go with that. I don’t want to. I purposely lied on the test to check to see if I need to be medicated for my lack of attention. I don’t want to take more meds. But I think I really may need it. It can wait until I go thru another personal crisis and go back to therapy, though. But I don’t want to go back to therapy, either. I’m a mess and I choose to shut up now.

Oh, and nobody asked what my resolutions are for this year. I did want to take a shower in a truck stop, but that’s out. So I will go with I don’t really know. The truck stop one was kind of a big deal, but it’s a bad idea now. So maybe I can make a list today and that be my blog tomorrow.